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[the_adjutant]

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[the_adjutant]

[ Oh. OH. ]

Like Mister Sims and his cat thing? People pretend to be dogs?

Not that I'm judging.

[ This better not awaken anything in her. ]

[colorature]

kind of like that
sort of
i dunno he likes to bark during sex among other things
its ok you can judge a little
he deserves it

[the_adjutant]

Well.

What sort of training does he need?

[colorature]

well he drinks a lot
and comes home drunk a lot
he doesnt really like talking about feelings either
i know he tries to be better though

[the_adjutant]

have you tried swatting his nose with a newspaper?

[the_adjutant]

or rewarding him with a treat when he does well?

[colorature]

i havent tried swatting him
i bet he would be into it though
usually i end up rewarding him with sex

[the_adjutant]

right uh
what is he doing that you don't want him to do?

[ What is her life??? ]

[colorature]

well i wish he would drink less...

[the_adjutant]

Ah, well.

I'm not sure how best to deal with that, except maybe by making sure there's nothing to drink at your place.

Maybe reward him for staying sober?

[colorature]

i try to do that
i guess i can try to reward him more

[the_adjutant]

I'd say swat him on the nose when he misbehaves but I'm not sure that works well on men.

[colorature]

i'll do it anyway
and see how it goes

[the_adjutant]

Well, keep me posted.

[colorature]

i will

[the_adjutant]

Wonderful. Good luck.

[ Riza isn't sure what to think. Did she really just advise someone she met once on how to train her boyfriend as if he were a dog? This feels surreal. ]